Heard in the Trenches

I've been such a neglectful blogger, by way of peace offering to the blog-gods, I bring to the table the many "Heard in the trenches" quotes I've been amassing. Enjoy :)

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Zoe was playing with a toy car (the Flintstone kind you sit in and use your feet to move around). She impatiently honked at me and announced "Mooo-oom, that means I need gas".

I came over and pretended to fill-er'-up. Then I held out my hand to her and said, "That will be 25 million dollars." She looks at my hand, reaches over and pretends to grab something out of my hand, then put it into her pocket.

Me: (laughing) "No Zoe, you're supposed to give me money!"

Zoe: "Oh yeah, I forgot . . . you don't have any money."

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Aiden and Jonah were sitting at the table eating when Jonah sneezed. Aiden started freaking out . . . . "Mom! Jonah Bless-you'd all over my cashews!!!"

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Overheard:

Aiden: "I wish I was a monkey."

Jonah: "Why?"

Aiden: "Cause then I'd always have to eat bananas."

Zoe: "No Aiden, we're peoples (pointing to her hand and arm as if this would prove her point), see peoples."

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When we visited the Tulsa Zoo, we stopped at the flamingo exhibit. Zoe was fascinated and ran right up to the fence and poked her face through the bars. I could hear her saying, "Hew-wo fwamingo! Hew-wo!" She paused and turned to me, "He's not talkin' to me!"

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Aiden and Jonah were playing with their matchbox cars when I heard Jonah tell Aiden:
"Aiden, this gold camaro (pronounced ka-mar-o) costs infinity dollars. Bumblebee, the yellow camaro, costs google dollars which is $300 dollars less than infinity."

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Aiden has a serious problem with staying on his bum in his chair during meals. Hence I'm constantly telling him to "Glue your bum to your chair." One particular day he kept popping out of his chair (effectively making a big mess and dropping crumb trails everytime he got up). I noticed out of the corner of my eye that he'd gotten out of his chair again and, in exasperation I said, "Aiden, why are you out of your chair again?! Do you want to die today?"

He pronounced, "I'm getting a napkin to clean my face . . . I'm not a di-er!"

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Zoe has a pencil that changes colors with body heat. She lamented to me one day that "This pencil is not change colors, that's why it's needs new batteries."

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Aiden was playing a game with markers. He was using them as magic wands, walking around the house pronouncing, "I turn you into a frog", etc. I overheard him saying, "I turn you into something that looks just like you." (Pause) "Hey, it worked!"

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Aiden and Zoe were playing "Go fish" and I told Zoe (who'd never played before and doesn't understand the subtleties of the game), "Okay Zoe, it's your turn. Ask him if he has a card that matches one of your cards." Zoe nods and says, "Aiden . . . do you have a card that matches one of my cards?"

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Aiden (out of the blue) turns to me and says, "My favorite character on Cinderella is Angry."

Kolbi: (rolling her eyes and in her best pre-teeny-bopper, somewhat disgusted voice) "Aiden, don't you mean Grumpy on Snow White?"

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On a particularly rainy day, I could hear Aiden and Zoe going around the house singing, "It's raining, it's pouring, the old man is BORING." (Giggling) I asked them where they heard that and they proudly pronounced, "Grandpa Pete taught us that!"

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Pop (Chris's dad) (in a very sweet and bonding moment) was reading a book to Aiden. When it was through, Aiden looked up at him and said, "That was great Pop . . . Now can you turn on the t.v. for me?"